My sister, Janelle takes abuse from the older siblings, she has for years. She is the one who wants to stay connected and involved in all of her siblings lives and her nieces and nephews lives. She just has to be a part of everything and feels so bad when she can't be somewhere. When she has missed a family get together there's always a phone call from her during the event. "What are you doing?" Is everyone there? What are you eating?" She just has to know! I feel bad for mocking her for so long, for making fun of her phone calls and her need to be connected.
I finally GET what she feels when she's not with the group. My family is together right now in Utah--all of them, Mom and Dad, Keith, Craig, Brad, and Janelle. But, not me. I'm in Georgia with my family. We didn't make the trek to Utah this year and I'm feeling a little sad. Everyone is having fun. The traditions are happening without me. It feels weird and disturbing to be the odd man out. Everyone's laughing and bonding. I can just hear it now. Sunday dinner today was probably a grand affair, orange rolls included. Sitting at the dining room table long after the meal has been eaten. Dad laying on the floor napping with his arm draped over his eyes. Cousins running up and down the stairs, laughing, yelling, giggling, crying. Dishes galore, china and goblets waiting to be washed. Talking. Laughing. Teenagers hanging out while listening to their Aunts and Uncles describe crazy life experiences and stories from the past. Reminiscing. Mom enjoying her children and grandchildren. Rehashing story after story...we all know they get better each time they're told!
It's hard to be so far away and have so many miles between the ones I love. We have a great family--one that I'm proud to be a part of. What a blessing to be missing my family and wanting to be with them. There are some who just cringe at the thought of spending a vacation with family for any length of time. Thanks to all of you for being the kind of family that I long to be with. Hope you had a great dinner tonight and save a spot for me at the big dining room table next summer. I am SO there! Love you guys.
Thanks, Sheila, for giving us a little perspective on things. It's amazing how much wisdom we gain when things aren't perfectly arranged in our lives. We do miss you here. Your description of Sunday's dinner was spot on, complete wiht boys running around.
ReplyDeleteBren, Craig, and I went on a killer hike on Saturday up a mountain in Little Cottonwood Canyon. I was thinking that Dallin would have thought it was cool. Well, Hang in there. We'll see you again sometime, just not this week.
Well you made me tear up. I guess you do all like to torment me. I think Keith enjoys it the most though. He would always call me from wherever,, before I had arrived to the vacation, and rub it in. Like the concert in front the capital on July 4th with Clay Aiken singing I think... and he has called from NYC and also Maine eating Lobster with McCoy and Craig and Dawson. We do miss you. Gretchen and I were trying to plan a dinner and I was just like,, "I don't know, I'm not in charge,, who's in charge here,, where's Sheila?",,, because Sheila is always in charge of the food and making great meals. I feel bad that you feel bad and I am trying not to call you to tell you fun things, but you end up seeing it on the blog anyways, we're sad the Carroll's aren't here. We'll see ya next year for sure.
ReplyDeleteI do know the feeling of being left out of family outings. Keep doing great things with your own little family as it helps. We did miss you all not being here. We look forward to seeing Ashton soon. It will be nice to know that she is close by.
ReplyDeleteI loved your description of Sunday dinner. That is how I remember it too. I am thankful that I had the opportunity for so many year to be able to spend Sunday dinner and special occasions with you guys. You are a wonderful family.
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